We thought this might be a summer with some big musical names coming to Beijing, but it seems it’s business as usual.

Robbie Williams has decided not to entertain us, canceling his entire Asian tour earlier this week. It’s the second time Robbie has decided not to come to Asia, having bailed on a a 2006 tour to the region. The official statement said something about a situation “beyond the artist’s control,” although we interpret that to mean “low ticket sales.”

Also refreshingly pre-cancelled is Maroon 5, which I don’t even remember being announced. Not sure what the official reason was, but we’ll assume it’s “Adam Levine has vocal troubles” or “Adam Levine and his Victoria’s Secret model wife are too busy banging like animals to care” or “Adam Levine can’t remember who the other four Marooners are at this point.” Something like that.

Which brings us to the big question: if we’re back to pre-canceling shows as normal, will the biggest kahunas of them all, Linkin Park, go on July 26? They have also cancelled before, although that was due to a Chester Bennington skateboarding accident, rather than, say, cavorting with the saffron robe crowd, we’re now wondering if Laibach has a better shot of actually completing their two shows in Pyongyang than LP does of doing one in Beijing. That would be an interesting turn of events.

We’re sticking by our maxim: assume all Beijing musical performances are pre-cancelled.

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